Wednesday, September 24, 2008

The Spin

In a comment on my last post, Niksmom reminded me that I never need to "spin" things for the readers of this blog. And she is so right. If ever there was a group of people with whom I knew I could just lay it all out there, without fear of judgement, it is with the regular readers of this blog.

I spin for myself. I believe my own PR. I have to. And maybe that is why I blog, too. I need to frame things, in writing, in a way that lets me keep on moving forward with optimism and hope. So yeah, there are lots of sucky days (well, lately) but I want to be the glass half-full kind of mother. I have to be that kind of mother because Oliver deserves it.

So I'm already spinning. I don't know what is going on with Oliver. That is the hard part. But my intuition tells me that it has something to do with Sami starting pre-school, his growing awareness and interest in other children, and his increasing desire to communicate. He is struggling with all these things so it makes sense that he wants to retreat to more mindless activities because the dynamic world is becoming bigger and more complicated. He is tackling bigger and bigger challenges. What remains to be seen is how he will work it out. How WE will work it out.

Anyway, there is one big thing that has most definitely changed for Oliver. The evidence is in the video below taken today. The second video is from our vacation over the summer and it just makes me smile. And maybe that is what I need to end the day with.


  1. Look at him trying to make eye contact with the goat!!! How SWEET!! What's this toothless grin:) Oliver is about six months ahead of Wyatt, was Oliver okay with loosing the teeth?

  2. Auuughhh! It came out!! Did you have to pull it?

    I bet he misses apples. :-p

  3. Anonymous2:07 PM

    Love the smile!

    I think I tend to mostly put a positive spin on things too - for the same reason that you do. It helps me make sense and gives me hope.

  4. Anonymous6:22 PM

    I believe that when a child, especially a child on the spectrum, makes quantum leaps in development, there tends to be a backlash. I've seen it again and again with my daughter "Marie" when she was younger. When she was making important strides in her intellectual, social or sensory development, there would be more anger and meltdowns. I believe it is a normal part of neurological growth. In case that makes you feel any better when you're in the middle of a particularly exhausting, sucky day. :-) And, yes, I think your regular readers definitely get the **real** stuff.


  5. Love the toothless grin - just in time for Halloween! Frog and Diva were both really early losing teeth. The vacation video was priceless. Does he have such a good rapport with most animals?

    Keep on focusing on the positive mom, it keeps you sane. But know that during the times that gets too hard to do - we are still here for you and still interested, and still in Oliver's corner cheering him on!

  6. Oh my, what a cute little toothless grin! But I LOVED the interaction with the goats. How sweet.

  7. I am struggling with the same thing with one of my twins. It has been almost a year! I hope it is a stage...he is so much less engaged than he used to be. But during the same period he started understanding language, using small sentences, noticing other kids (a tiny bit).

    I tell myself that when his brain sorts out all this new stuff, he will go back to being more engaged. I can't wait for that to happen.